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Sunday, January 10th, 2010
12:27 pm - I now have 8 hours of cleaning on my hands and it is my fault!!
1. I do not believe in New Years resolutions.
2. Just because I don't believe in them, doesn't mean I won't use them as an excuse to set goals.
3. So one of my "new Years" goals is to keep my food budget to $50 a week... including fluffy coffee drinks and going out to eat. It isn't really that strict. I have an out. I have a $50 discressionary budget for entertainment if I actually go on a date with a boy and a $100 "need to get laid underpants" fund. This $150 a month will never get touched. Trust me. AND that too will go towards paying off the credit card.
4. The $50 food budget was to accomplish the following:
a) Dig myself out of the stupid f-ing Broken Car/Broken House/Christmas debt.
b) Help me lose weight since I will not have infinate fundage to eat drink and be merry.
c) Help me stop wasting food. I think all Americans do it to a certain extent... buy 10 lbs of apples because it is 10 lbs for 10 bucks, scoop up 20 yogurts because they are half price, or buy the extra box of Captain Crunch because there are cool toys in the box etc etc.

So in order to keep on the $50 a week kick, I started looking at building meals around what was already in the pantry. This forced me to conclude that I had set up my kitchen ass backwards. I decided that I needed to move everything off the top shelf that I use even semi-regularly. So I took everything off all the top shelves of my kitchen and put them on the counters. I then dragged out all my serving stuff and wine glasses and stuck those on the top shelves regardless of "kitchen zone". Then I decided that my canned goods all needed to move out of the cupboard they were living in and it snowballed from there.

I now have abount 8 hours of work to do re-organizing my kitchen... in order to walk through it without kicking over a stack of something. You won't believe how many old and expired things I have found squirreled away. I can't say it will never happen again, but it won't happen for a while. Such a waste! I am officially a bad monkey.

current mood: irritated

(2 feshly juiced | need squeez'n?)

Thursday, December 24th, 2009
9:24 am - Fire
Apparently I don't react like a normal person when it comes to the oven catching on fire. Go figure.

(need squeez'n?)

Wednesday, December 23rd, 2009
9:45 am - Christmas
Is really wiping me out this year. Next year, starting in October I am going to get in shape for it. Fill grocery sacks with 20 lb weights to simulate flour sacks, do yoga so I can gift wrap more efficiently, do some balance and agility drills for the parking lots and loading of the car. I got it all mapped out.

(need squeez'n?)

Tuesday, April 3rd, 2007
12:49 am - Can't sleep, can't sleep, can't sleep!
Watched all of season one of The Tick. Read some Neil Gaimen short stories (that wasn't smart, I know). Pased around. Brushed the dog. Logged into work remotely and answered some e-mails. Can't sleep. And I know I can't sleep because I left work at 7:30 tonight (well last night now that it is morning), and I will be at work before 7:00 AM tomorrow. Since I dread heading back there, I want to savor every momment I am not there and therefore CAN'T sleep.

I really miss having my guys on nights like this because they almost always had some way to make me go back to bed. Or worst case scenario, I would climb up to the top bunk in Ross's room and he would tell me math stories until I passed out.

I can't wait until vacation in August when I will be with the boys for a whole week. We will be in South Carolina and while I have about 50 million things I want to do and see (I am the only one who has ever been there so I have been making lists of stuff to do). I already know my favorite part will be at night in the hotel room(s) watching bad television, playing with old decks of magic cards, and finally, listening to the boys snore.

current mood: awake

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Saturday, March 31st, 2007
4:05 pm - Work is so intense...
That I love to just wander the house like a ghost on Saturdays. Take naps, watch stupid TV, read a good book and sit out on the deck. I just don't like to be with anyone on Saturday, and I don't feel like doing anything productive. I just want to cuddle up with my dog and enjoy doing nothing. If only I could figure out how to get my chores done with this tactic.

(2 feshly juiced | need squeez'n?)

Friday, March 30th, 2007
8:21 pm - It must be a time for powerful dreams...
Last night I had one of the worst dreams I have ever had in a very long time. I dreampt I woke up to the sound of dripping water and when I jumped out of bed the floor was wet and the outside corner of my room was totally soggy from the ceiling down. I just stood there kind of hopeless, staring at the stain and the water, and then I realized my room was a total mess and I needed to clean it up before I called a repairman... but I couldn't clean because I had house guests and I didn't want them to know I was a slob. So instead of fixing the roof that was letting water disolve the drywall in my house, I manicly entertained my dad and step mom and tried to push them out the door. Of course they wouldn't leave and I just kept giving them food and drink and smiling and when they were distracted working on the mess. I woke up crying. Its been 15 years since I did that.

Plus I think I pretty much know what all this means and am really upset by it. Now the question is how to let go of it.

current mood: exhausted

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Monday, March 26th, 2007
8:01 pm - My family might be cute....
My grandma does not go near computers, so when I forward something to my dad, he prints it out and sends it to my grandma, who then answers the questions and sends them to me.

Cute thing I learned from grandma on this last round was she didn't get her driver's license until she was in her 40's... they didn't have driver's licenses when she learned to drive.

current mood: chipper

(need squeez'n?)

Friday, March 23rd, 2007
8:22 pm - Northern Exposure
Basketball had destroyed my evening. Seriously, I just don't understand the sport and when it takes up too many tv channels, its like all of cable and network plays reruns and total crap just to piss me off.

Which tonight was a good thing. Colorado PBS plays Northern Exposure every week night at 7:00 and I always mean to watch, but get distracted by all the nifty discover channel shows and movies on TMC. Tonight I had no excuses so I flipped it on, just in time to hear the opening theme song. I had forgotten how great that show was. It made me home sick and uplifted at the same time. The episode was the one where Maurice and Holling have to bury their friend at No Name. It was so perfect I turned off the tv after the episode. It just seemed wrong to watch anything less well crafted.

(1 feshly juiced | need squeez'n?)

Friday, March 16th, 2007
8:34 pm - The Tick vs. Season One
I caved and bought it. No one else is a fan and so as I run around yelling Spoon! and Evil is a foot! and I am full of tinier Men!! and I don't speak your crazy moon language! I get the impression that people in white coats are stalking me. I wish they would just stop fighting over copy rights and give us the whole dang animated series.

current mood: bouncy

(need squeez'n?)

8:15 pm - My Family
I just can't get over how my dad marrying a gold digger has brought the rest of the family closer. My cousin, who is 15, now calls me about every other week just to talk. My uncle sends me amusing web sites (he and I could not be more different but our twisted sense of justice and humor are in synch). My grandma hasn't said anything mean to me in about a year. She even apologized to me for avoiding my entire childhood. My aunt comes to visit me. These people have basicly left me alone my whole life and now they are reaching out. It is pretty cool. Now if only my dad weren't such a toad and could join in there could be a Carlson family reunion on the horizon.

My cousin is going to be 15 on the 21st. He is a picky little bastard with just about everything under the sun. I want to get him something cool. Can anyone think of something cool to get a jaded teenager?

(1 feshly juiced | need squeez'n?)

Sunday, March 11th, 2007
3:03 pm - The Mysteries of Butt Hair...
I just left a butt hair comment in a friend's journal and it got me thinking. People who have pets understand butt hair. See, butt hair indicates a lot about your pet. If your pet is blowing its coat, the thick butt hair comes out in chunks, ie chunky butt hair. If your pet has long hair, the butt hair may become problematic and require shaving. When your pet is angry or stressed they can rip the butt hair out. And as a pet owner, this topic not only does not embarass you, it is a topic of interest. To someone who does not own pets, this topic is a sign of insanity.

I am going to brush my dog out right now and go after all the chunky butt hair.

current mood: amused

(need squeez'n?)

12:49 pm - Dear god!!!
I dreampt I was 30. I will be 30 at the beginning of October in reality. In this dream I was already 30 and I told someone I was 29 and they shook their head and said "Too late. You had all the time in the world and you are still too late. Your 20's are done and gone." But I don't know what I was too late for. It is really bothering me. I can think of lists and lists of things I could be too late for but... hmm.

current mood: frustrated

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Thursday, March 8th, 2007
9:18 pm - I got played!!!!
My boss ditched me for dinner and I was stuck going out on a business dinner when I needed to stay and try, for the love of #@$%^!, to catch up on all my e-mails, phone messages and projects. I could just kill my boss who called me and told me at the perfect moment that I could not back out. Argh.

So now it is almost 9:30 and I am just cracking the laptop to finish up what I should have finished hours ago. At least I can work from home and enjoy the dog sleeping at my feet.

current mood: bitchy

(need squeez'n?)

Saturday, March 3rd, 2007
10:34 am - My dog makes me laugh...
I could not sleep last night so I was up and down and restless, finally giving up sleep to get some work done from home. My dog is unphased by all of this and slept through everything. And yet, when I went out to get the paper she still beat me to the door. And somehow in the space of grabbing the paper she manages to take a dump on the neighbor's lawn and take my place on the couch, leaving me the cold cushion. I'd kill her but she is so cute.


(2 feshly juiced | need squeez'n?)

Sunday, February 25th, 2007
8:51 pm - Watching the Oscars...
I realize I have seen 3 movies this whole year and am not really regretting that. Weird. In fact I am thinking about turning off the boob tube and putting in a movie to fall asleep to.

Oh, and Clint just wlked on to the theme of the good the bad and the ugly. Sergio, I am inspired to watch you tonight.

current mood: blah

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10:30 am - Tired of being tired
I slept most of yesterday and I still want to sleep. My ribs hurt and I have weird muscle fatigue. I know that is because of the meds and the pneumonia, but the day is beautiful and all I can do is sit on my deck in the sun. I want to go for a hike... or even bend down and tie my shoes without passing out. Ugh.

I gave up any food served out of a drive thru window and soda pop for lent, but I am caving and drinking pop. The fizzies cut through all the nasty stuff I am coughing up where water is just making me gag. I know I am a bad monkey, but being sick makes me wimpy. Besides, alternating pop and water and vitamin water and juice is still not getting me enough fluids. Side effects of all the stuff I am taking is dry mouth and trouble peeing. I need all the help I can get. I am trying to get motivated to bathe now. Urgh.

current mood: annoyed

(2 feshly juiced | need squeez'n?)

Friday, February 23rd, 2007
5:23 pm - Mind Boggling
I have Monday off, but I have so much work, I am considering coming in. I would really like the discipline to stay here and crank it out, but all the stuff for the pneumonia is catching up to me. I need to go home before I can't make it home.

I was contemplating today that at some point in my life I shifted from a Target person to a Walmart person. It all started when I bought a house. A nudge into the more budget friendly... and then Target stopped carrying my shampoo, and then Target stopped carrying my make-up... and finally when Target ran out of the lotion I like, I knew that that was the end. I still visit Target and look for deals in the home decor section, but that is a special trip. It makes me sad. Walmart used to be evil and Target was good, but as soon as Target got rid of its parent company, Dayton Hudson, Target became just as evil.

And yes I track the parent companies of most retail stores and no I don't know why.

current mood: blah

(need squeez'n?)

Thursday, February 22nd, 2007
6:50 pm - Argh!!!!
I have $@&*(#! pneumonia. How the $&!#% does that happen? I can't see my dad in the hospital. I am basically quarantined in my office at work. They check my lungs again tomorrow and I don't feel good about it. I may be fat but I can now identify every one of my ribs.

On a side note I gave up all soda and any food that comes out of a drive through for lent. No I am not Catholic, but this practice makes sense to me. I am now regretting my choices because I am a walking disease fountain. Pooooop!!!

current mood: sick

(2 feshly juiced | need squeez'n?)

Tuesday, February 20th, 2007
6:05 pm - Whirlwind weekend...
Saturday, got up at 4:00 AM so I could pack and spend the weekend at my Dad's and not miss a second of my cousin's hockey tournament... took Monday off so I could be at the hospital no later than 6:00 AM to escort my dad into total knee replacement surgery.

Last night I finally made it home, exhausted, sporting a 101 fever. 3 days where I am up before 5:00 AM just did me in. Still went to work today because reviews are coming up and I need to pull numbers for my people.

Going to go to Walmart and shop for toys to give dad tomorrow in the hospital. He should be out Thursday or Friday. Surgery went well, but the amount of pain he is in the amount of physical therapy should stand as testament to all that you need to treat your body kindly whenever possible. I feel guilty that I am not with him now, but I can't tell if I am sick or SICK. Plus he sounds so tired on the phone that it felt like he was done with visitors for the day.

current mood: tired

(need squeez'n?)

Friday, February 16th, 2007
5:47 pm - The Lonely Big City Feel
The small taste of Chicago I had is making me crave the big city. Denver does not have a "walking" downtown. There is stuff to do but you have to own a car and most of it is out of the city.

When I lived in Yokohama I took the train everywhere(duh, Japan) and was so much more active. I went to film festivals, temples, the zoo in Tokyo, all over the place. There was so much to do and see for free. When I was in London for 3 weeks, I did the same thing. Ate great food, went to musicals, went nuts. When I lived in Portland... yes even though Portland is small, the public transport rocks. And so the taste of Chicago has made me crave to live someplace other than Denver. I hope to be here for another year so I can get some money out of my house... but after that I think I need a change.

I need either a smaller more artsy town or a a larger more vibrant city. Anyone have any premonitions or suggestions?

current mood: contemplative

(3 feshly juiced | need squeez'n?)

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